by Zac Majors
In-Laws Moving In? Here’s How You Can Politely Say No!
Family-life is filled with ups and downs. You win many, you lose some. From the financial planning aspect between you and your partner all the way to your in-laws, you both are going to have to deal with a lot together. However, one problem that you might feel like you’re alone in are the in-laws.
Remaining friendly with in-laws can seem like a monumental task, especially if they are moving in and you’re about to say no. It is natural to assume that they will start blaming you or harbor negative feelings for you, but remember that at times, saying no is the best way forward for you and your spouse.
But how can you say no politely? Here, we’ll discuss a few ways you can say no to your in-laws politely.
Just Talk to Them
The first thing you can do is talk to them and consider every aspect of your decision. You might not be trying to be the bad person here, but if you don’t have the full perspective, you might just end up becoming one.
If you don’t listen to them, they will feel like they’re under attack by you, which will end up ruining your relationship not just with the in-laws, but also potentially your partner. Once you have a clearer picture, make a plan you’re both comfortable with.
Be United With Your Partner
We’re not suggesting that you don’t talk it out with your partner and go where the wind takes you. Instead, sit down and have an honest one-on-one with them about the situation. Let your partner know how you feel and listen to their perspective. Remember, a no coming from the both of you means much more than from just one of you.
Not to mention it’s much politer.
Let Your Partner Lead
When it comes to your parents, you should take the lead. But since it’s about your partner’s parents, let them lead. Remember; they’ve been at this much longer than you and therefore know what to say and when to say it.
When the no is coming from their own blood, it means different and chances of confrontation become much lower. Even if there is an issue with your decision, it will remain short-lived compared to if you yourself say no.
The situation will be exacerbated if you don’t get along with your in-laws, since chances are that if you’re the one saying no, it can (and perhaps will) be perceived as an attack.
Whether your in-laws are here, on their way or simply thinking about it, it is important to get on top of it all. Understand each other, make a decision based on the facts, talk to your partner, and under no circumstances should your tone be stern.
Best of luck!